to start falling in love with an idea of someone.

Commissioned from =mafer on deviantart Click the thumbnail for the full sized picture! A scene from Lottery, Library. Jack cuts in on Ben and Richard's argument, with Jacob looking on. If anyone wants to make icons or anything from this go ahead!

Am kinda amused that Raya Haji/Qurban/Eid-il-Adha is close enough to Thanksgiving this year. So enjoy your holiday folks ^^

Speaking of holiday, my plan to go to Big Bad Wolf was delayed. I will probably ended up going Monday as I really don't feel like braving the weekend crowd today. Hopefully there are still some good selections left T_T

I love sga_storyfinders.

And cheesecake.

And look, I have both.

In fact, every sentence ends better if you add "... with cheesecake."

Having sprained my knee sleeping a couple days ago (how one does that, I have no idea; god only knows what I do in my sleep), I have a lot more 'at-home time' on my hands. While most of this time has been spent whining and/or watching Star Trek in one variation or another, luckily I have still managed to do an hour or two of MRP-related reading and note-taking. The going is slow, but as long as it's going, I'll pretend like it doesn't matter. But! Don't mind me; all the Advil I'm taking for menstrual cramps has gone to my knee and my brain, and we're all a bit fuzzy right now.

So anyway, I found this neat song reprinted in Harley Erdman's Staging the Jew: The Performance of an American Ethnicity, 1860-1920 (a book only peripherally related to my project, but really fun and interesting work), and I thought I would share it with you:

( What happens when a Jewish Girl and an Irish Guy fall in love... )

OMG, Thanksgiving. Srsly? I spent it with my stepmom's family. IDEK what to say except that these are the two key phrases uttered during the course of the day:

a. "Go sit on your vibrator!" to step-mom's mother

b. "She clearly misunderstood when I said I was into pussy." to my father by MrIris




Minnesota bandboys tomorrow. I am sort of excited about this. In the meantime, sushi and wine. What's not to like?

(Gary Oldman is on my TV right now. It means that I'm procrastinating about leaving for drinks and sushi. GARY OLDMAN AS COMMISSIONER GORDON IS THE SHIT, OK? Plus, Heath Ledger.)

I found an article on the web about a young woman who has the same disability as I do. From how she describes it her case is very similar to mine as are her feelings about social things like dating and all that fun stuff.

http://yourtango.com/200941714/dating-disability?page=0%2C2

Posting a link here so I can find it later :)

So glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving.

Oh, I drank too much for Thanksgiving. Ugh. Now I have to get ready for my Nihongo lesson, and then pack for Orycon, which starts today.

So, the Phoenix Literary Magazine for my local community college (award winning) has asked me to be on their selection committee. Came to me and asked me! Well, based on my English teachers recommendation (though I didn't think she really liked me.) I think that is totally awesome and I said yes. I wonder how much work this is going to be? But I think it will be good for me and my 'writing' resume. Now if only I could get something put in it, too. hehehe

---

Thanksgiving.

I was just informed that mom and her roommate were expecting me to do the Thanksgiving turkey. Along with pumpkin pie (crust from scratch) and my cheesecake.

Whut-?

This is going to be one of those weeks, isn't it?

Good thing it's 9am.

Here's a fanfiction heart attack.

Midway through my sga_santa fic, the borrowed laptop suddenly freezes.

Happy Thanksgiving to all those in the US who celebrate it. Hope you all have a good turkey day and lots of fun with family or whoever you're spending it with.

I realise I haven't updated here lately. Basically nothing other than ordinary stuff going on. Minding the grandson two or three days a week, painting and decorating the hall, stairs and upstairs landing - a huge, horrible job - and otherwise I'm just generally hibernating with a good book in front of the fire!

Or the TV. Some pretty good evening viewing at the moment... almost too many to mention. I'll pick a few. Ray Mears with his exploration of Northern Canada and history of the Europeans who mapped the country by adopting First Nation methods of travel and survival, has been absolutely stunning. Better TV you could not wish for. Andrew Marr and his Making of Modern Britain, also excellent TV. Tried the new sci-fi/crime series, Paradox, on Tuesday and found it *interesting*. Jury's still out really. Excited by the latest Dr. Who a couple of weeks ago. Creepy and edge of the seat stuff... exactly what one has come to expect from the series. After a slow start Merlin has turned into the second season I hoped it would be. So much to love about it - the double ep with Uther falling for a troll was wonderful. And I'm loving all the Arthur/Gwen shippy stuff and even some of the Arthur/Merlin bits when previously I've been a bit bored by that (too obvious). And weren't they all great on Children in Need? LOL! Loved the 'Round the World in 80 Days' series various celebs (including the wonderful Mr. Barrowman) did for Children in Need too. Great fun. And did anyone catch Buzzcocks last night? LOL! It was always going to be sooooo naughty with David Walliams hosting and so it was. Rivetting viewing, especially when he put the Swedish guy over his lap and spanked him. Heehee.

Pouring with rain at the moment and we have a chap here fixing our back fence. He's older than my hubby and that shocked me... I felt like I ought to invite him in to sit by the fire and go fix the fence myself...

Psych makes me sadface:

My general psychiatry module is coming to an end next week - it's been VERY interesting, but also (for want of a better word) depressing. When I see these patients with debilitating treatment-resistant mental illness, I just feel such overwhelming sadness for them. I don't think I could cope with specialising in psych. :(

One case really struck a chord with me - a gentleman in his 50s who has had florid paranoid schizophrenia since he was 18, with limited improvement on a whole cocktail of drugs. He has never been able to have friends, hold down a job, or have a relationship. He lives with his old fashioned, upper class mother who considers him an absolute failure. And on top of that, he had parotid cancer, the surgery for which has left him physically disfigured on one side of his face.

The sad thing is that when I went to talk to him (with his social worker) he's such a sweet natured, friendly guy. And he's so desparately lonely, but he can't bear to go out of the house because of his hallucinations and shyness about his disfigured face. He's in his 50s, but has the emotional maturity of a teenager.

And there's not really much else that can be done for him. :( What a waste of potential life fulfilment.

Exams also make me sadface:

Exams on 7th December ARGH. *cries* I am feeling nominally confident that I will be able to pass, provided I continue to revise as much as I have been in the past week. :S

I still have ups and downs with my feelings of inadequacy and fears that I have ruined my future career. I was feeling really inspired and excited over the weekend, after attending the Royal College Of Obstetricians & Gynaecologists Careers Fair. O&G has the surgical aspects which I love, but with the added warmth and caring that working with women and babies entails. There are also lots of provisions for part time work in the future when I decide to have a family. I was so squeeful at finding a potential alternative to hardcore surgery.

That feeling of squee came crashing down today, after I went out to a party with some uni and school friends. The vast majority of them were medics from my year (before I slipped down a year because of failing my exams) and I HATED all their sympathetic posturing towards me. I felt like such a loser.

One medic whom I'd never met before said that I looked more like a GP rather than an O&G - he meant it as a compliment (he said I was too nice to be surgical), but it really bugged me because FFS I don't WANT to be a goddamned GP. I don't want to be that small fraction of near-failing med students who can't get a job in a hospital specialty, but it feels like subtle hints from every quarter are pushing me in that direction against my will.

Sigh. I guess there's little point in wibbling about the future - I need to concentrate on the present and pass my exams. Otherwise I won't be a doctor at all, never mind a GP! :P

♥